Hi again ... As before i'd say the same thing , I'm neither a wonderful writer nor a great orator but whatever it is , I AM "ME" !
Really its been a long time i've boasted about my skills isn't it ?
I know I write very immature (mostly) ,many people read me and many people don't on the other hand but but but as I'm in a democratic country and i have all rights to enjoy democracy , so I've come up again with a few things which ae totally new and unexpected in life for a girl like me !
Recently , I met a girl in my latenight dreams . I added latenight as i do obvious day dreaming too so i gotta specify ! By theway , I don't know , who was that girl ? what she looked like ? etc . I don't even know what was her connection with me and why did she appear to me . All i remember is her name "shaarvi" . I remember how i reacted to this noun - "SHAARVI ! wow ! what a name ! "
Next morning , as I told you , all was out of sight but i really felt her presence , a wierd kind of some connection and an attachment and I decided , yeah ! I got a storyline on my mind and ofcorse I'm here to share that same thing with all my dear and lovely readers .
This girl 'Shaarvi' belonged to a small town in the state Madhya Pradesh . She was an average looking girl , never bothering about hi-fi people and what they think about her , living her life to the fullest with huge dreams .She , she didn't even know what was she upto and what will her life be in coming months and years ! All that she knew was her life , family , handful friends , scooty , limits , responsibilities of her own only , people , etc. She never cared how things will happen or what turns in life may take place . She just had faith , that was all !
But then slowly and gradually she started realising or say learning what actually LIFE is !
Its but obvious not easy as we suppose it to be . Its not a 2minutes maggi know !
Slowly-slowly , she learnt that the way she expected her life and various people and things to be was not at all same . Instead it was totally a vice versa situation !
Her actual responsibilities were in lime light now . Her mom and sister were her main priorities now . Thing were becoming tougher , which a normal teenage girl may not be facing . But she was !
Was shee ready ? Did anyone ever asked how she felt like or what she wanted ??? No !! and there was a big NO to all her questions .
In the process , she had to move on to Bangalore for her futher studies , miles away from her town , family and friends . Her life was nomore what it used to be !
When she stepped tha land of bangalore , far away from everything that was important to her , she made a few decisions like she's gonna start afresh and work hard accordingly . She'll achieve success and will never ever run behing for peoples goodwill . She'll be all on her own with no friends , she'll never ever fall for love ,etc . I can think of what she might have thought - " yaar , success toh chahiye but wo koi plate pe saje tarah tarah ke swadisht pakwano ki tarah thode hai jo man ko lalchayegi and asani se mil jayengi ! huh , jitni mehnat karo utni kam hai but pure jee jaan se kaam karungi and maa ka naam roshan karungi , behen ke saare sapne sach karungi ! "
But did this all happen ??? lets see ...
She , as i mentioned before , decided she'll make no new friends , she'll be living with full raw and rude attitude , no sympathy . She'll be harmful , selfish , etc . and with all this and passing time , she started with her studies. She was a computer engineer aspirant !
But with all this , nothing happened according to what she has decided . It never happens , its a nature's rule . Kitna bhi try karlo hona wahi hai jo khuda ne likh diya hai !
She made friends (life without them is incomplete ) ,partied , etc .She also went again her main decision , she fell in love for the first time ! She didn't want this to happen but...
Again , as always , time played an important role in her life too .Nothing was happening according to her wish , everything seemed to be as a slipping hand . She lost control over her mind and became more and more unstable .
She was acting normal , but whenever that guy came infront of her , a serene movement took place in her nerves and that moment , she felt more and more disheartened ! She called it love because this time it was really different , a serene connection and a desperate desire of being with that guy was there. There were many more things but then there was no use . This alll was no more happening and tolerable because she could tolerate anything but a HEARTBREAK ?????
Yeah heartbreak as she knew or say she assumed that the guy won't ever be with her , love her , like her and would never wish to be with her . This gave her more and more pain . Alas ! she decided to ignore him and thought that with time all will become neutral !
It became more and more difficult for her as whenever the guy appeared infront of her she felt that pain more ......
slowly slowly this wierd unwanted and left out feeling grew more and more in her....
Now , I would like to ask all my readers , do you really think that again everything is going to happen according to her ??? Is everything going to get normal ??? In my point of view , ofcorse not , but reeally i am not finding words to end up this story . I really wish for a happy ending but i have no magical wand in my hands ....
just wish ....................... <3 p="p">
Tanjul Sarkar
(aspiring jewellery designer)
