Not Just Another Birthday

A story of a guy that left me stunned with a magical feeling.....Here it is :

"Dated : 30 December 2013

Well, each year my birthday comes and goes like any other day..
There are a set of people who wish me , I thank them and the day is over...
My birthday is over!!!
But this year ... my birthday actually started a day before.
It started with a lot of confusion .....where to meet? how to meet? .. at the end just wanted to meet that someone very special..

We ended up at different places .. oh no !...more confusions !!!

.... And the birthday started the very moment I saw Tansen, my 'copper tellurium' crossing the road walking up to me.

I remember last seeing my watch at around 1pm when I was waiting for her...and next time I saw my watch it was 6:45 pm when I was boarding the local....
I never knew how time flew by.
I probably never had spoken to someone as much as I did yesterday with her.
It was simply beautiful, and music to my ears to hear Tansen speak. Indeed my birthday started a day before ...
Those strolls on the beach...with the chappals in her hand and her hair flying around...
I had not seen anyone pretty, she was beautiful!!!
It was all magical.
I was actually scared whether I was making a fool outta myself when I was with Tansen ...but then she made me feel very comfortable too.

Oh!!! Her smile is a killer...

And when I received the gift before departing .. the one that I wasn't supposed to open till 12...
Even now I can't recollect when was the last time I received a gift..
Not sure if I received any at all.. Or I received one to forget about it conveniently...
But there was something different about this gift ... Something special...
Was it the aroma or the feel..??
I was told the gift is delicate and so it is to be handled with loads of care...
At that moment even if she had given me a stone, I would have handled it carefully and protected it with my life...

The last time I saw Tansen was when she was about to board the bus.. She just turned around one last time before walking away..
At that moment, with the surprise gift in my hand... I walked away with a big smile on my face!!!
I was all super charged and had goosebumps all over my body...
wanted to go back to her..
but then I thought, 'what's the fun in going back when sometimes the pain of missing someone is more sweeter than the joy of having that person'.

My birthday actually started a day before and ended a day before ...

Today is just another customary day... when the same set of people will call me up and wish me like every other year ...
But yesterday, that one day with Tansen ... will remain stuck in my mind as sweet memories for years together ...
This was my birthday...
This was my gift.... "


-Anonymous

GeeENious diamond ltd.

Really , this company is the best company ever i could have .
company partners : Harshita Khemka , Bharat Verma , Forum Damani , Nikhil Jain and last but not the least Tanjul Sarkar ( me....gigglesss).

It all started just a month back , like planning and plotting and its today together we stand .

I am , as always I say , bad at explaining things , convey my emotions , express my feelings in words ,etc...So again I'm back here with the strongest machine which does all the above stated work for me , writing..(not as an author guys... I'm not a scholar)

Last few  days were like whuushhhh , came and went but the memories I collected in this quick pleasant storm are for LIFETIME.
I never thought I'd come uptil here but hatsoff to You people.

I know , all the readers are a bit confused , like what the hell I am talking about ....but don't worry , I'm gonna explain.

This Harshita and Bharat were short term course student at my institute for diamond grading... oopss I forgot one of the most important member too  whose gonna handle the marketing dept. of the company , Mr Nikhil (same course) .. and my soulsister  Forum , all know...!!!
We all met for lunch and from here our friendship start , a journey of 3 people from different cities and 2 mumbaikars .
Harshita from bangalore (b'lore) , Bharat from amritsar and me ... kanpur.

I know I am using quite heavy terms but its nothing like that.
Its just we loved spending time with each other . Whenever I was with them I forgot all  the existing "shittssss" in my life...haha.
Just , I learnt back again how can I be myself.... you know ... same old crazy gal tag !!! I love that tag... I wanna be that and all credit goes to Nikhil and Harshita and Forum... I know I couldnt tell you guys about it before as I thought you'll think I'm crazy but because you know it now , lemme tell you ... I got this from you ... I was feeling snatched away kind for the past few months ... but today I stand as ME.. accept it or not ... I'm gonna be the same ... I know the different and how it feels now !


Laughter moments , lunch times , getting late , pandya sir laughing , bharat cracking the silliest jokes in his typical punjabi accent , I laughing like a crazzyyyy funny bull , forum catching me from falling down , harshitas spinning head and best "cz , feather and black bindi in a packet, go home make diamond " .... wow.... moments for lifetime.. !!!

I don't really know when are we meeting next , but for me , this relation isnt seasonal.
I am scared to make things such close , but when a relation without any expectation comes up ... things become fantabulous...


Love you guys ... I really don't know whether you understood or not ...what I wanted to say but from the depth of my soul....we are GENIAASSSS forever....

Thanks...

This is for my soul sister ...
I think it might be very precise expressing my feelings here... but , I am really very happy that I have got that opportunity to be such an important part of your life . I am really wonderstruck that you chose me to present that surprise "Knapsack of hope"...
 Its one of the most beautiful and unexpected surprises of my life...
Thanks alot ...
Love you tonsss.....
Tanjul

No one can beat this...

Hi ....
I really don't know whether any one even did this or not , but i think that many might have done it because girls are girls..

I really went for nailpaint shopping with my soul sister "forum damani"..it's like ...tanjul really... our first nailpaint nailpaint shopping that too a proper one took place at colorbar

Really awesome experience....
love u soul sister...
can't even forget this day...

SOUL SISTER... HOW AND WHY IS A QUESTION ....

Hi ...  again a long time back I am here .

Today was day of fun only i suppose...Basically we were called by our design faculty to help our senior designer students backstage for the show IIJW thats going to held on Monday. But , but , but ....me and me other 2 friends : sharvari and forum (soulsister) were busy with our photoshoot .. Haha !!!
Actually , only 6 people were allowed in the Grand salon where rehearsals were going on along with the dresses and models...

One thing I really saw , that made my mind clear... No doubt models are super sexy alongwith their superrrr rude behaviour...
chuck it anyhow...

After we were given a legal permit by our faculty , we left the premises ... And then it was fun time with soul sister going shopping...

We were badly hungry no doubt ...

Any how , that was really fun searching for a bus to our destination with forum .... who spends nearly double money going via autorickshaw... its recession time...for us... :P

Shopping was so quick.... i really can't even imagine.... no doubt everything happens once in a lifetime.. hats off to forum damani...


It was a day of my first experiment of trying Italian Cuisine at "Ci-gusto" with soul sister... I know it sounds a bit funny , but never got such opportunity...


It was my second best Friendship Day with Forum Damani after 2011 which was spent with Mishika Srivastav , my sisso.

It was one of the greatest days i'll always love to cherish... thanks foruuuuuuuu...

For YOU :)

Well well well... again I'd start with a bit of mello , because without it sometimes I feel incomplete . Kidding huh !
I have never been good at expressing me feelings in person , really . This sometimes works as my strength but most of the times its an unwanted weakness too.
Now , its quite wondering that who is this  "YOU"...
Its one of my friends and My first friends in my carreer life in mumbai "Manas"...
I have rarely mentioned about him , that never meant that he never existed or never captured any importance in my life .

Yeah , we became friends on 17 june 2012 and after that we hardly talked or met .
It was after 1 yr when I shifted near his place and we met almost daily which still continues...
Really , after I got this friend ... frankly speaking , I never bothered about making new friends or running behind the existing ones , because lately I realised that it was hardly worth.
I don't mean that it was because Manas regularly visited me so we had been in touch regularly , but you know there is always a connection . He was my friend , he is my friend and will be my friend forever.
I know my nature is , 'was' to be precise ...like first being close to someone and then running away from that person giving silly excuses... but things do change ,  I have fealt it so not to worry Manas , this wierd and stupid crazy friend of yous is never ever gonna excape from your life..

It is really strange  , friends say " whenever you need me , just remember my name and i'll be there !" No doubt this is very true, but not always and not with everyone. This is the reason I stopped believing on all these sayings but truly Manas , in a way or other proved both the parties wrong (silly friends and me )...He really made me realise that one should never run after people or run after making new friends because hardly few are gonna stay forever . Its just how to choose those 'few' .

Many things were coming up on my mind but don't know why , everything disappeared.

I don't know and ever bother where do you or me belong...But this friendship is strong enough to make us belong to a world where truth lies...

Thanks for being there always and your encouragement and support...
Don't still feeling as if I missed hell lot of things but I am happy finally I managed to express something with the magic of words :)

Be happy always ... YOU rock !!!

:)

Thoughtss..

Hi,
Finally i'm back here after a long time . Was out for vacations .
After I am back , I don't really understand whats actually happening and going on in my mind but seriously this is something , my institute friends aren't gonna like it . Till date I was something , like yeah u can say that I was real me but now as situation changes I understand we too need to be with the flow , but with that we never have to forget that we all have our own individuality.
I know this might be a regular teenage problem but frankly it really makes me more and more crazier each time I give it a thought.

I am reading this novel by Nicholas Spark " The Last Song" . Don't worry I'm not going to talk about any romantic stuff or something but there was a situation when the girl's father thinks and understands his daughter and decisions as this is a peculiar age . The only difference with me in real life is this that I don't have 'that' father's heart who supports his daughter and understands him .
My dad is alive , but ....
I might be sounding rude.


I am witnessing this change of being bold , not caring about what people actually think about me , expect from me . I am not scared to accept the truth, whatever it is (good or bad). I need to be stron in a situation like this where I dont have my father to say " go on child , if any mishap takes place , I'm there . Don't worry ! ".
Really I need that but there is one more truth that I can never forgive him , I can never love him and i can never hate anyone like I do to him.
I know this very strage like the way I'm talking about my father but now I really don't expect anything to be back on track. He hardly bother . For him if  I'm a headache , wow ...
I , no doubt , am independent with my thoughts but just one thing has changed me and made me dependent , its'money'.
I really need to work hard and prove people , I wasn't a waste ever.
No one has the right to judge me , my character , my individuality but along with the world , my own dad has judged me so very well . I will shut his mouth.
Earlier I expected , he'd make everything alright , work on his mistakes , but I was wrong . And now , I don't even wanna give a damn to it . GO TO HELL ! I don't care.
I am no more scared to accept this publicly because if anyone wanna befriend me then this isn't gonna make any difference.

I know I have hurt many people in last 1 yr , but today I am sorry .
I really am !
Not because I need them today but just because my heart wants me to apologise . I started living in my own fantasy world but it did break because I faced the truth. These things look good in movies only. They aren't meant for a story in real life .
I did hurt the 2 most important people of my life , my un biological sister and someone special : mishika and abhijeet ... both are srivastavs..


In last 1 yr, I got good friends forum and abhijeet (in mumbai) ... and my work ... my second love :)

I really cannot reverse the time but all I can do it to hope and keep trying.

I really have no answers to their why ? But I wanna say , I Love You (mishika and abhijeet ).

me .... again

I don't know how many people out there are really reading me , thinking about the situation with their own way of handling them . I really don't know in past few years what have I gained or may be lost ....Actually i might be knowing but I really don't have a coun'on them . WOW !!! Isn't it ?

I have always thought that this life is so got damn easy , means I really wondered why the great scholars and  philosophers mentioned such things but now I realise that no doubt , they deserve to be what they were and deserve the respect which people do offer them . I know I'm simply confusing the whole screwed up situation but still this is what actually going on in my mind.


Lot many people came and went away as I have mentioned it before , this is kind of a ritual of life . People come and go making the incidences happening or happened a chapter of a great book called life .
Similar situation exists here , which I'm talking about !

Today evening I was thinking about this more than friend of mine 'Abhijeet' . You know what is the best part in him ? He always tried to make me feel low . But lemme correct here , he encouraged me and threw out some catchy hurting words which I feel make me low. But today I was wondering that , although I felt low for may be a day or two , but at the end , I improved myself and tried not to make that mistake again !
There may be such friends in everyone's life I suppose!

Its today I realised that few people who made a chapter in my book mentioned that I was selfish , egoistic , umm... stubborn and many more words from the english dictionary, were right. I always thought and said that why the hell they prove me like the ones in those words but today is the day I realise that yeah , I always wanted to see the world and treated them with the perspective I wanted to ignoring all the if's and but's . I expected that this whole world should walk the way and direction I want it to move.
But this is not right . If I always wanted to be a good human being or may be a good person as the great philosophers and so , atleast I should have respected them by trying to know what they wanted !
I always made my choices , no doubt the situations always helped me in making the bad and wrong choices . argh !!!
I am a simple normal girl but then , I'm accepting that I always pretended to be great .
I pretended or may be that was within because I never tried to correct myself as I always thought I was right ....

Today , I have made the greatest mistake of my life and I'm sure thats for final !
Actually it's not the greatest but yeah it's one of those which ultimately screwed me up badly !


Now onwards , I'm sure I'm nomore going to make any such decisions and if in anycase I'm going to make one then that will be the perfect one.
I have experimented with my life alot , now I cannot afford to do it anymore to myself. I really don't even have the option to reduce this mental pressure of an unsuccessful decision on my mind by blaming some or the other person because it was MY decision .
I won't say its worthless , because ultimately I have learnt the most important lesson of my life. I am really not made for these experiments . I was the one who decided few things before stepping in this city where I live now , but then I only ruined up the whole thing !  Wow .. !!!
There was a movie " Band Baja Baraat " in which the lead actoress also does the same thing . I'm just giving an example , don't wanna connect with the situation there because it was a movie .

Now its time,  finally I have to put a fullstop to all this stupidity and start afresh !
Its been one whole year I have been  here and no doubt I have been through hell lot many ditches ! But now , they are meant to be over because they themselves are saying 'enough' !
huh ... !!!
I don't wanna play anymore  ! Because I cannot run anymore from me . I need to accept few thing and just appear totally new tanjul sarkar !
Already , I have suffered hell lot because of my ....
But now I have got to do something for my sister , for my mother  and then settle and have a family of my own ... Yeah I want to  .. I suppose every girl wants that !


There are hell lot many words from the dictionary I want to use to express myself but I think its enough for now ... I really wanna thank my sister "tanisha"..
I hardly think I've ever mentioned her name , its kind of a relationship we both share. Fights and love but at the end we both stand for each other ... really love her alot and for this change that is gonna get in me I'd like to thank Tanisha and Abhijeet and Maa and yaa , mishika too.


There's one more person I wanna thank who got me a different version of mine , but then I really don't wanna take his name . It hardly matters to him . He is very practical n least emotional.. huh ! God bless him !

Feeling far relieved ...
thanks antas

After a very long time ...

Hi to all .
These days due to various reasons i'm a bit infrequent here but yeah , it always keeps running on my mind "ANTAS"... because its a part of me only !

Yesterday , we made up a plan to go for this superhit movie "Iron Man 3" which was just awesome in simple words . Oops , forgot to describe we . We , I meant for me and my very good old friend of this city Manas . Literally , had great company of him .
There was this part when all the suits of Iron Man came out to the battle field , I was totally out of my mind yelling whoooooo n clapping ... whoa .
Sometimes when I think of him, our superhero , I wish I were a supergirl type stuff having those high tech inventions n blah blah blah !!!! day  dreams !!!!

Aftr this movie was over , I was to return home for it was late but to add my anxieties , manas took me to the back road near my resident ... and that was the another moment of the day . Knowing this place where i recently shifted ,  enjoying my ride .... that cool breeze...!

                                                    After a long time  ... I lived myself !!!

That very shine of a smile ...

Its been a very long time i have interacted with people all round this globe.
There have been hell lot of changes in the past few months which made me learn a few very important lessons of my most important exam of "LIFE"...

It was last Sunday when i was on a road trip in our fav car wagonR going to town within mumbai .
me and other 4 friends of mine - sharvari , nikita , karan and amogh ; were laughing out loud and were cracking the worlds most silliest and worst pj's . As usual we stopped when traffic light was flashing red and there came a vendor selling those sheets which prevented sunlight falling in the car . Frankly i cannot recollect what it is called but yeah , i disripted the use of it.
We were in mid of that traffic thinking what shall we do ? we should buy it or not !???? And then we decided we'll buy 2 for rs.100 and the vendor agreed .


It was then when i noticed his eyes and kept looking at it for continuously 3-4 minutes when i realised that how important it was for him to sell those things. How happy he became when he sold 2 of them to us.
His eyes were glittering by the reflection of sunlight , it means his eyes were a little watery !
How tuff it is for him to run in between the vehicle while they stop when traffic light flashes red !
How rarely people do buy those things ? Suddenly 100's of questions captured my mind with hardly any answers to it and i kind of tried hunting those answers by cutely asking my friends , why is there so much of differences !
WHY?
In this race of poor and rich , emotions are slowly and gradually losing its grab on people.
I  hope my future generation thinks a little

Is it so easy ???

" You never know ".. this i grabbed from one of my seniors and my bestie... really , sometimes i feel how different it is to plan a totally different thing for yourself and with new people , time and surroundings , some totally new things and plans come up to you. It was a time when i never thought this way or you may say decided not to think this way but now i am . You really don't wish to give this right to anyone to hurt you , abuse you or do anything which makes you sad , but as time goes on things change and the things which you never wished for are youselves encouraging for.
I know you all might be very well confused to make up what i actually want to say .... Its just you think something , something different happens....blah blah blah............

Designing , My Favourite Job !

 Here are some designs designed for plaing gold jewellery !

 

These are designed at a very basic stage as in manufacturing i still have a long way to go here as well but I know i can do it. These are pendant sets . These were the assignments given by me ....

CAD designing

my design.

Tanjul Sarkar

(Aspiring Jewellery Designer)

Tasks performed by me in Manufacturing Dept. by me in 1st semester !

My tool kit

Open cube

Hemisphere

Melting Silver (Ag)

Wall hanging designed as well manufactured by me using scrap metal (brass & copper)

Plain sheets of brass and copper given to us for performing various exercises !

Different objects manufactured by in the end of 1st sem after polishing (emery)

Cuff Links designed by me .

Sphere made up using 2 metals (br & cu).

Box with a lid as per the given dimensions by the institute ( lid holder designed by me) .

Male female !

Sawing exercise

Sawing in and out .

Sawing and drilling on a metal !

Knife / envelop cutter as per the dimensions and design given by the institute !

Sterling silver(925) swastik pendant as per the design and dimensions given by the institute .

Pendant designed and manufactured by me .

Pendant designed and manufctured by me as per the criteria given by institute !

My experience at the manufacturing dept. has been very intresting . It always made me more and more excited and enthusiastic to learn more and more . I always waited and still wait for the new exercises and to explore more , experiment more with different tools and tactics. I still got to learn lot more and go a long way ahead !

Tanjul Sarkar 

(aspiring jewellery designer)

!!!!!!

Sitting on the pavement outside my house, sound of crackers coming from far away seems some marriage celebration is going on , insects making a creaky sound seems they are talking to each other ... all this is giving me a feeling of being lonely lost somewhere in a dark jungle . I know it may sound wierd to some and intresting to others but that is what I am ! Just time to time I am thinking about my friend who is really very upset as he lost his precious pearl ! I know this will pass on soon .

The moon , high in the sky , looks so beautiful tonight , hiding behing the clouds playing hide & seek spreading its glittering light . Beneath , stands huge trees which are such dark that it is hard to mane any difference . This lonely moment , ah ! I wish ... behind the trees stands a temple , light glowing and spreading a lil light of its own .

I love admiring the moon , its so peaceful and calm !

There is so much pain in this whole world . Every person is facing some or the other problem ... i just sit and think - is there a single person who is really having that peace of mind which i really wish to have ? 
I never get my answer although . All are running behind some or the other thing , some run behind money , some are after their goal , some are after their love , some busy taking revenge , etc.
This is it ????


Tanjul sarkar
aspiring jewellery designer  

i wish i was there with my people

Its really becoming more difficult for me than i guessed !
Durga Puja is one the main festivals for bengalis and i am very much into this fest as it is my favourite festival but this year its not the same as always .Since i was a child to till date i have been celebrating this festival in my hometown with my community members friends and family , people know me well there and i know them too... I am  one of the youngest one in the series of my generation .

There people are for the people and by the people but here the case is totally different and show off business is at heights... !!! i am not among them and i am again left out... missing kanpur , missing home... !!!

Thank You MAA

I have always been sharing many diffferent aspects related to me , my life , my thoughts , etc. but i never expressed and shared my feeling I have for my Mother , the respect i have for her , the love , the understanding , attachment  !
Today whatever I am , however I am I can proudly say i am my mother's daughter . Really mothers do have a magical mind.. They are always able to read whats going on their children mind.
Today the person who understands me the most is  my mother . She is not only an admiration for my but she is an inspiration for me too. Whenever I talk to my nanima (grandma) , she always tells me stories from my mothers childhood and teenage life  , all her habits , way of living life , managing things , adjusting at different circumstances , hardwork she did all through her life , her anger , her patience , everything .
Today I can say I love my mother more than anything else. Really , today i'm alive , i'm happy , i'm working hard just because I know that my maa is always there by my side . Whenever I'll tend to fall , she is always going to be there to save me , to hold me.
 It was time I never thought so deeply about  her , about whatever she does for me or how important she is to me . But today I know , .... frankly speaking i am getting emotional n even getting short of words... its just

                        I LOVE YOU MAA !

IS IT ME !!!!

Hi again ... As before i'd say the same thing , I'm neither a wonderful writer nor a great orator but whatever it is , I AM "ME" !

Really its been a long time i've boasted about my skills isn't it ?

 I know I write very immature (mostly) ,many people read me and many people don't on the other hand but but but as I'm in a democratic country and i have all rights to enjoy democracy , so I've come up again with a few things which ae totally new and unexpected in life for a girl like me !

Recently , I met a girl in my latenight dreams . I added latenight as i do obvious day dreaming too so i gotta specify ! By theway , I don't know , who was that girl ? what she looked like ? etc . I don't even know what was her connection  with me and why did she appear to me . All i remember is her name "shaarvi" . I remember how i reacted to this noun - "SHAARVI ! wow ! what a name ! "

Next morning , as I told you , all was out of sight but i really felt her presence , a wierd kind of some connection and an attachment and I decided , yeah ! I got a storyline on my mind and ofcorse I'm here to share that same thing with all my dear and lovely readers .


This girl 'Shaarvi' belonged to a small town in the state Madhya Pradesh . She was an average looking girl , never bothering about hi-fi people and what they think about her , living her life to the fullest with huge dreams .She , she didn't even know what was she upto and what will her life be in coming months and years ! All that she knew was her life , family , handful friends , scooty , limits , responsibilities of her own only , people , etc. She never cared how things will happen or what turns in life may take place . She just had faith , that was all !
But then slowly and gradually she started realising or say learning what actually LIFE is !
Its but obvious not easy as we suppose it to be . Its not a 2minutes maggi know !

Slowly-slowly , she learnt that the way she expected her life and various people and things to be was not at all same . Instead it was totally a vice versa situation !
Her actual responsibilities were in lime light now . Her mom and sister were her main priorities now . Thing were becoming tougher , which a normal teenage girl may not be facing . But she was !

Was shee ready ? Did anyone ever asked how she felt like or what she wanted ??? No !! and there was a big NO to all her questions .

In the process , she had to move on to Bangalore for her futher studies , miles away from her town , family and friends . Her life was nomore what it used to be !

When she stepped tha land of bangalore , far away from everything that was important to her , she made a few decisions like she's gonna start afresh  and work hard accordingly . She'll achieve success and will never ever run behing for peoples goodwill . She'll be all on her own with no friends , she'll never ever fall for love ,etc . I can think of what she might have thought - " yaar , success toh chahiye but wo koi plate pe saje tarah tarah ke swadisht pakwano ki tarah thode hai jo man ko lalchayegi and asani se mil jayengi ! huh , jitni mehnat karo utni kam hai but pure jee jaan se kaam karungi and maa ka naam roshan karungi , behen ke saare sapne sach karungi ! "

But did this all happen ??? lets see ...

She , as i mentioned before , decided  she'll make no new friends , she'll be living with full raw and rude attitude , no sympathy . She'll be harmful , selfish , etc . and with all this and passing time , she started with her studies. She was a computer engineer aspirant !
But with all this , nothing happened according to what she has decided . It never happens , its a nature's rule . Kitna bhi try karlo hona wahi hai jo khuda ne likh diya hai !

She made friends (life without them is incomplete ) ,partied , etc .She also went again her main decision , she fell in love for the first time ! She didn't want this to happen but...

Again , as always , time played an important role in her life too .Nothing was happening according to her wish , everything seemed to be as a slipping hand . She lost control over her mind and became more and more unstable .
She was acting normal , but whenever that guy came infront of her , a serene movement took place in her nerves and that moment , she felt more and more disheartened ! She called it love because this time it was really different , a serene connection and a desperate desire of being with that guy was there. There were many more things but then there was no use . This alll was no more happening and tolerable because she could tolerate anything but a HEARTBREAK ?????
Yeah heartbreak as she knew or say she assumed that the guy won't ever be with her , love her , like her and would never wish to be with her . This gave her more and more pain . Alas ! she decided to ignore him and thought that with time all will become neutral !
It became more and more difficult for her as whenever the guy appeared infront of her she felt that pain more ......
slowly slowly this wierd unwanted and left out feeling grew more and more in her....

Now , I would like to ask all my readers , do you really think that again everything is going to happen according to her ??? Is everything going to get normal ??? In my point of view , ofcorse not , but reeally i am not finding words to end up this story . I really wish for a happy ending but i have no magical wand in my hands ....


just wish .......................  <3 p="p">

Tanjul Sarkar
(aspiring jewellery designer)

cOnNeCtIoN....

A big hello to all my readers.. you all might be thinking ki what all shit i've been writing for a last few months... that zeal , that feeling was missing ! isn't it ? Again i'd say the same that i neither a great writer nor an orator , 'i'm just me' ...


It's after a long time , i heard my soul in the silence of 'MOUNT MARY CHURCH, BANDRA' .. really thanks to one of my friends isha who took us there... i lighted a light turquise n white colour candles... felt good ..

I don't know whats happening to me , that zeal , excitement , desire and what things again gathering up in my life , i wanna live again just not for the sake of living but for 'living' .... again that feeling of moving on adheres my mind... i wish , i can just wish .... i don't know whats actually happening or may be i know but i don't wanna accept.. haha again your friend means me is in the same dilemma ... today after years i had 'ichak dana' ... ayush told me the name.... this place i visited today , i'm in love with it...i could have never thought  or imagined of such place here in mumbai ! And was searching of such place in the crowd of millions. I don't know how to take this ... was it a coincidence or its all planned before hand... i wish i could read few things... which always leave me behind with a big '?' ... its just a new girl in a new city found an awesome place where she could find that connection.. when this connection thing misses na , everything is just a formality .... and when you get connected its just you yourself... its been after 3 months i was in my form , i didn't bother what the world around me would think , what tantrums i'll get , what and how my friends or others will criticize me , i don't care about a single thing...that loneliness ka tag still there but it got a different meaning in my life . I just know that i'm gonna be stronger and nothing can break or let down this strength , this confidence .... nothing ... ah i'm just speechless ... loved the day ! thanks to my friends - rashi , ayush , dhawal , dhwanil and isha <3>

a new world ..... for me ...

I can say i'm one of the luckiest person on earth as i have chosen this field as a career and then a profession ... as this field  is a kinda rare though coming up with a great speed ... i wanna share some facts about it...

Jewellery Designing

ON THE back of a sizzling growth of the organised jewellery industry, striking job openings and exciting entry-level salaries, many specialised institutes catering to the industry have mushroomed in the recent past. It's a fine era to consider jewellery designing as a career preference.

India is the largest gems and jewellery market in the world (the domestic market is Rs 63,000 crore), but largely in the unorganised sector with a significant focus on gold. With the entry of big players like Tanishq, Swarovski, DeBeers, D'- damas, the shifting thrust on gems and stones rather than pure gold is giving a big push to the organised gems and jewellery industry.

Your grandma's old jewellery may be treasured and pricey heirlooms, but they simply do not hold a candle to the existing styles being worn. Jewellery these days is exclusive and contemporary. "People are very image cognizant. They don't want jewellery as a representation of financial security but to make a fashion statement and also as trends wear that suits different occasions."

 Getting Started 
Previously, the single way to learn this skill was to be an apprentice to an experienced jeweler. But these days, one can take up a diploma course in jewellery design after school. Numerous institutes, all over India, present diploma courses in jewellery designing. A student has to pass an aptitude test and interview before qualifying for the course. One could be from any field. But an art background does help in the long run.

The course gives you essential information on the diverse kinds of stones, colour schemes in jewellery, design themes, presentation and framing, designing individual jewellery pieces, men's jewellery, costume jewellery, jewellery costing, etc. But to a professional in designing jewellery does not need formal training. A professional in any other field can take up jewellery designing workshops and set up a business production house.

• Opportunities
  One can work in any of the following sectors:
  • Jewellery designing house
  • Export house
  • Fashion house
  • Self-employment
  • Freelance designing
  If you join an export house, you can see your new designs in the international market. Most of the students start their own business by setting up a production house.
  
  As a freelance designer your job is to draw a design according to the specifications of the jewelers' house. You also need to direct the manufacturing of the jewellery by the craftsman of the jewellery house.
• What it takes?
  •  There are no specific personality traits for jewellery designers. One can learn everything while getting trained. However, you just need a passion for the profession; otherwise there is no way one can learn.
  • A sense of design is imperative. Precision and attention to detail are also equally important for a successful jeweller. One should be very creative, imaginative and technically sound.
  • It's also important to have a working knowledge about manufacturing.
  • One should be well-versed with the fashion industry on the international front too.
  
  
  
• The Job
  • Jewellery designers prepare sketches - by hand or on the computer - to conceptualise the design. After consulting with the customer or the manufacturing team, designers fashion detail drawings, a structural model, computer simulations, or a full-scale prototype.
  • Computer models allow superior effortlessness and flexibility in exploring a number of design alternatives, thus reducing design costs and cutting the time it takes to deliver a product to market.
  • Designs are created on regular or floral patterns and then generate forms by connecting different structures together. The range of raw materials is exhaustive - from economical and easily available stuff like paper, wood, terracotta, jute, to highly priced Swarovski crystals!
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  Tanjul sarkar
  aspiring jewellery designer 

???????

these days if u see me then u will fina a biggg "?" on my face. Means literally it has really become difficult for me again to judge people and i'm again back with that same thought of mine.. "i'm happy alone" ....different people different thoughts and all in all a different and diverse reality ...and then after fighting with my thoughts i reach at one decision " i've stepped in this city , in this college to study and become something . So why should i be bothered about other things when they hardly matter to me ???" n again i start thinking that why i shouldn't bother too.. ufff... i really hate this tom and jerry fight of my mind n my heart :(... really !! And then nowadays to add to my sadness , i'm missing my home , hometown , food and everything soo god damn badly ... sheh !!! plzzz. need some air lord ... need some space and all in all need some stability of my mind .....